Two people holding hands

 

Written by Lexie Graf

 

When John McCain and Aretha Franklin passed away, they each had an extravagant funeral service to honor their lives. This gave their families, friends, and fans a chance to remember their legacy and come to terms with their loss. However, when Doris Day passed away, there was no service to honor her life. According to her will, she didn’t want a funeral, memorial, or even a grave marker.

 

Everyone should have the right to choose their end-of-life wishes, but it’s also important that they keep their loved ones in mind when making these choices. Because at the end of the day, your funeral isn’t necessarily for you, it’s for those who love you.

 

Below are a few reasons why having a funeral service is so important.

 

Helps Loved Ones Begin Their Grief Journey

When there is no funeral service, your friends and family may have a hard time accepting that you’re really gone. By having a service to commemorate your life and grieve your death, loved ones can begin their journey through grief. Funerals don’t necessarily bring closure, but they do help people come to terms with the reality of their loss.

 

Creates a Sense of Community

A funeral service gives all your loved ones a chance to gather with each other, creating a sense of security and community. Grief can make many people feel alone and isolated so knowing that others are feeling their loss too can be comforting. They can talk about their loss, their memories with you, and what they plan to do moving forward.

 

Rituals and Ceremonies Are Important

Life-Cycle Celebrant Linda Stuart often shares the importance of rituals and ceremonies. She said she has seen a recent trend where people say they don’t want a funeral service. She believes that this is because many people don’t realize that they don’t have to have a traditional funeral. Currently, there are more personalization options than ever!

 

Instead of no service, pick the traditions and customs that are important to you and your family. For instance, at her mother’s funeral, she plans to do a champagne toast to honor her mom’s love for the bubbly drink.

 

 

It’s Not for Yourself, It’s for Them

This truth is, you are not the one attending your funeral, your loved ones are. So, think about what would be healing for them. Your family wants to reflect on your life and properly honor who you were.

 

Start talking to your family about your final wishes. Programs such as Have the Talk of a Lifetime make the conversation come more naturally. Using the cards they provide is a great way for families to learn more about each other. By strengthening your bonds now, you will leave a lasting legacy.

 

How do you want your funeral service personalized? Share by commenting below!