A woman sits in a dark room.


Written by Matt Frazer


The loss of a child is one of life’s most devastating events. Children are not supposed to die. Parents expect to see their children grow and mature. Ultimately, parents expect to die and leave their children behind. This, to most parents, is a natural course of events in life. When a child dies, the death signifies the loss of the future and of hopes and dreams for who they believed their child would one day become.


Known as one of the most intense forms of grief, the death of a child leaves parents feeling as if a part of them has died. They are faced with the paradox of having to live on as fully as possible while coping with the loss and grief.


Bereaved parents need to find ways to express their grief, and to hold on to the memories. Many bereaved parents come to learn that their memories are the most precious gifts they have ever received.


Additionally, siblings of the child who has died often may not have a specific way to express their loss and feelings of grief. Some children will not talk much, and some will talk to strangers about their loved one who has passed. Although grief in children is normal as it is with adults, if emotional or behavioral problems are extreme, or persist beyond six months, or if they diminish the child’s ability to learn, professional help should be sought.


Most funeral professionals, while well versed in grief counseling and helping families plan life celebrations will often say a funeral of a child is one of the hardest of services. The devastation of burying a child, coupled with making day to day decisions and completing tasks that once were done without thought, may now be painstakingly difficult.


A funeral professional can help parents in mourning by providing customized funeral products, unique ways to capture memories and as always, a sympathetic ear — to just listen.


Funeral software that has been created specifically for the funeral industry enables the funeral professional to customize funeral stationery and other items for the life celebration. Some personalized funeral items include prayer cards, memorial folders and funeral register books customized with the child’s name, picture and a specific theme to match the child’s interests or favorite colors.


DVD Tribute Videos can offer parents a way to hold on to their memories in a special way. Comprised of photographs, music, videos, and words, these movie-like Tribute Videos can be created in-house, by the funeral director, and will be unique keepsakes for the family and friends.


While the loss of a child is often unexpected and overwhelming, creating a fully personalized funeral service doesn’t have to be.


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